Growth Spurts: A fuel source for Tantrums

Mornings have been going well. Drop-off at school, not a problem. Even pick-up from school AND bedtime have been relatively peaceful until that fateful day when everything blows up. It’s as though a force has taken over your child. NOTHING is right.  Every reaction is dramatic and over the top. Ask them to dress or pick-up and they drop to the floor like an inert rag doll incapable of doing the things they could the previous day. What’s up?

Check your calendar.  Is your child within 3-6 weeks of their birthday or half birthday?  If so, this unexpected and unwelcome change in behavior may be a growth spurt. What to do?  

Know that your child does NOT like to feel this way. It’s as though all the internal systems are crashing and burning. Talk with your child. Assure them what they are experiencing is typical. Everyone goes through growth spurts – even adults!  Soon they will be through this.

Be patient and provide lots of soothing activities. To avoid feeling manipulated to do for your child what they have been perfectly capable of doing, proactively ask, “Is today a day you would like help dressing or can you do it yourself?” If they do want assistance, help them, but nudge by saying, “Okay, today I will help you, but soon, maybe even tomorrow you’ll be able to do it yourself.” One day they will. In addition, add in massage, more outdoor time, water play, cuddles and reading and other soothing activities. Fiercely protect their sleep and if possible, reduce the demands on them.

Celebrate! One morning your child will awaken standing taller, spouting a larger vocabulary and demonstrating new skills. You have all survived! To prepare for and make things easier for next time, mark your calendar – potential growth spurt period! Plan accordingly. If however, after six weeks your child continues to struggle, dig deeper there may be something more going on.

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